Where do you draw the line when it comes to love and fighting for what you believe in?
Loving someone can be wonderful and painful all at the same time. Coming from a woman who has had her share of heartbreaks, I must admit that it is easy for my insecurities to get the best of me. I always managed to choose the same type of man. No man has ever stepped up to the plate to swing when it came to proving their love for me. They were only interested in running the bases to get what they wanted.
No one wants to feel unloved or un-special. It is a horrible and dreadful feeling that I would not wish on my worst enemy.
Tears were running down my face while I was driving home. There were no texts or missed phone calls the entire trip and it felt like my heart was ripped out of my chest, one artery at a time.
It is understandable that things don’t always go as planned but it is not right to have to feel left out in the cold.
I believe that when a man loves a woman he defends her. When you love someone you fight for them. After all isn’t true love worth fighting for? The victories are substituted with anniversaries and the gold star says,’we made it and we did it together.’ She is his princess and he is her soldier. Together everything is meant to be where it is.
Perhaps I ask for to much to want to feel important to someone. Perhaps, I settle for any form of affection that I can get. I re-play everything over and over in my mind wondering if I should have chose option B instead choosing A. I guess I will never know.
All I know is that I am not perfect but who the hell is. People love to talk about me but they know nothing. If someone attacks me, I attack back. I don’t put up with bullshit anymore. I can’t undo the past but I am on a promising path finally. This path doesn’t have as many potholes and speed-bumps like the path before.
Although I have learned to be alone, I have tasted love and I have felt love in the past few months. I worked my way into a comfort zone that I felt safe in. Maybe that wasn’t such a good idea. Now my heart is open, attached and un-guarded. Maybe it's the way he touches me or the way he looks at me. I believe in my heart that everything he has told me has been true and genuine.
Therefore, I have no regrets. At least now I have wonderful memories that can make me smile and cry. Love has been truly defined in my life and even if it doesn’t last forever, at least I had the opportunity to explore a feeling a have never known before.
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